Top 10 Self-Love Tips for 2020
HAPPY NEW YEAR MY BEAUTIFUL PELICAN LOVERS!
I hope you all had a lovely Christmas and New year and celebrated with your loved ones. This was my first Christmas in 2 years that I spent at home and not in a hospital bed. It was so good being able to eat Christmas dinner instead of soup for once. I had such a good December overall; I went to Prague with my boyfriend and it was so beautiful. The Christmas markets were nice, and the food was even better. I always get a bit of anxiety when going abroad when it comes to thinking of what food I am going to eat if it’s going to hurt my belly or put me on the toilet for hours. I can happily say the food in Prague was delicious. If you go to the unique cafés and restaurants you find lots of traditional Czech dishes. A lot of them consist of potato dumplings, bread, lots of meat, stodgy food. This is good if you have a stoma because the food will help thicken your output, and if you’re like me and have had a reversal, you’ll have to be careful with certain spices, so it’s good because most of their food is served plain with gravy, but still with lots of flavour.
2019 was the end of a decade and the start of a better one. 2020 is the year of being selfish when it comes to you and focusing on growing and making sure you are your number one priority. In this month’s blog, I want to just touch on a few things you need to remember in 2020 that will benefit you.
1: KEEP PROMISES TO YOURSELF
You know how horrible it is when somebody breaks their promises, it’s disrespectful and sometimes hurtful. You may have people there for you but at the end of the day when it comes down to it, you only have yourself, so why be disrespectful to yourself?
2: SAY NO WHEN YOU NEED TO
I know saying no at times can be hard. You feel guilty about upsetting people and letting others down. I am a big sucker for this. It creates anxiety and stress when you feel you can’t say no to plans. This is the year that all changes. You need to come first. If you don’t feel like going to that event, who cares? It’s okay, just say no and be strong about it. Those who care about you will understand, those who get funny with it really aren’t worth your time and it’s time to consider if they are really worthy of being in your life. We don’t need that negative energy in 2020.
3: WORK THROUGH YOUR DISCOMFORT
We all sometimes put things off because it’s out of our comfort zones and we automatically become overwhelmed with negative thoughts. I am like this, I am supposed to be re-taking my driving theory test but because I have failed I am now too scared to re-do. I let the anxiety get the better of me and keep putting it off. This year I am going to force myself to re-do the test and get on the road in my little car as quickly as I can. Sometimes we have to just push through the anxiety and worries and force ourselves. The feeling after we’ve pushed ourselves is always a good one. Otherwise, we can’t overcome our fears if we constantly try to put them off.
4: CONSIDER THE COMPANY YOU KEEP
I have what some people would say a lot of friends. However, if I had to pick out my real ones it would be a lot less than the amount of friend’s people assume I have. As I have gone on my journey of growth I have realised as much as I love some of the people I have in my life, not all of them are good for me at the stage I am at. You need to surround yourself with people who are on the same wavelength as you. You need to separate yourselves from those who don’t share the same interests or can hold you back or those that always have negative thoughts.
5: PUT YOURSELF FIRST
Take days where you spend it completely treating and pampering yourself. Taking time to read spiritual, or self-help books. Take time to say actually today I am going to dedicate this whole day of doing things I want to do.
6: BE BRAVE
2020 is the year we have no regrets. So, if you feel that you want to say or do something do it and have no regrets. Do it and be committed to it 100%. One thing I do a lot of now is go for a Nando’s by myself. I take my iPad, download my favourite TV series and watch it with my headphones in as I eat my food. I used to think, oh I could never go eat alone but now I love it. My next goal is to try to go to the cinema alone. Be brave do these kinds of things, sometimes you have a better time.
7: FORGIVE YOURSELF
We all need to forgive ourselves for things we may have done in the past. Mistakes are made to teach us lessons; they will keep happening in different forms but with the same type of message until we learn from them. When you have a spare 10 minutes sit down and take a pen and paper and write yourself an apology letter for the way you have treated yourself or acted in the past. Write it down and let it go. We want a clear 2020. If mistakes are made in 2020, as we all make them, take a second to realise the reasoning behind these mistakes and what you can do to forgive yourself and what they are trying to teach you.
8: TAKE ACTION OF YOUR GOALS
This one is a big one for me. I see a Trauma Counsellor and one of the things I really struggle with having PTSD is actually achieving my goals and making them happen. I sometimes have so many great ideas and things I want to do but doing them seems so hard, and they just don’t happen. My Counsellor and I are currently working on what to do to make this better and we have made a list of goals and wrote down underneath them the little steps and actions I need to take to get to achieve my main goal. This you all can all do also. Have a go.
9: BREAK THE HABITS THAT HOLD YOU BACK
This one is easier to read than it is to do I am not going to lie. I have a real struggle getting up in the morning and working on my goals because I am always tired. I understand with Crohns Disease one of the things we will always have is fatigue. I have to try, even though I feel tired to get out of bed and go about my day. I have wasted so many days in bed when I could have been up and working on things. This is one big habit that I have that really does hold me back.
10: STOP SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF
You are capable of achieving whatever you want if you are willing to put that work in. This is why affirmations are so important. Say those affirmations and believe you are amazing and great and watch the magic happen. Positivity is key. I am very big on the Law of Attraction and although some of you may not be into it as much I really do believe the energy you put out into the universe manifests and helps create your path in life. Believe you can do it, and say it with your chest, say it with confidence and go out and fulfil your goals and dreams.
I hope these 10 pointers help and I do hope you can take if not all but some of the pointers away with you. Remember 2020 is going to be a good one. It is our year! If you want any more advice or want to post your goals feel free to tag me @natalie_amber1 on Instagram or #selflovebynatalieamber. I would love to see and help give you some positive boosters if you need them.
See you next month!
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